Our son will turn 5 on Feb. 1, less than a month away now.
It’s incredibly bittersweet. I miss the baby days (although I definitely view them through the perfect Instagram filters I used to document them, and have most assuredly forgotten about the sleep depravation, the monotonous pumping and the what seemed to be never-ending teething…although it did end as it turns out).
But I have loved every stage – newborn, waddler, toddler and now preschooler. Soon to be kindergartner! We hope for a typical kindergarten experience for him, but currently we are in the middle of a pandemic, with the faintest of ends in sight, as the vaccine slowly trickles its way through our country. My husband and I will be among the last to receive it, rightly so. We can both work from home, and have no health risks (that we know of).
Despite our lack of risks, we have chosen to self-quarantine during the pandemic, and we continue to do so. And we’ve chosen to keep our son home with us during this time, even though his child care center/preschool has done an amazing job with cleaning and other precautions. We don’t have family who would be able to care for our son if either of us would get sick, so we’re being extra careful.
All this to say, we’ve been with our son 24/7 during most of his fourth year, and while it’s exhausting being around this little ball of energy, it’s also been really fun. When you’re a new parent, you always hear about the “terrible twos” (not true), and the “threenager” (kind of true), you don’t hear much about year four.
Here’s what the fours are like:
- Negotiations – some parenting experts recommend presenting your preschooler with options – but ours will often create his own options or present a whole new deal.
- Games – lots of invented-on-the-spot competitions and also mundane everyday tasks get gamified, like brushing teeth and walking up stairs.
- Creativity – our son doesn’t have that negative voice in his head yet, telling him ideas are dumb or that they’ve been done before. All and any thoughts he has comes out with the kind of confidence I wish I could bottle and sell.
- Prowess – he has more control of his body and is more graceful, and he’s more adept at things like kicking balls, and he calls upon his experience more.
- Intelligence – his vocabulary has expanded exponentially, and he thinks through things – and he’s so clever now. He understands puns and jokes, and has memorized so many characters and plot points of his favorite shows it makes my head spin.
- Defiance – he’s growing more independent and has learned to placate us with affirmative responses, only to do the opposite of what we asked.
- Curiosity – our son has so much personality – he loves people, which has made our sheltering in place harder. But we’ve found ways to stimulate his mind and help him learn about the world.
- Affection – he’s still so snuggly and continues to be an empath (something he was born with, I think).
I’ve loved year four, and I know we’ll look back on these times and be really thankful we stayed healthy and got to spend so much time with him. It hasn’t been perfect – he misses his friends tremendously and I know his teachers would have been able to better educate him on traditional things like letters (he knows his numbers but not the entire alphabet by sight yet). But, our bond with him is stronger than ever, and I can’t wait to see what year 5 has in store for him!
angie hempel 